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i laughed out loud to this one

my pun of the year

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sad sam30/11/2009 12:00:53
606 forum posts
242 photos
morning all
a light hearted change of subject
my  75 year old mate went to the doctors and got a presciption for some
viagara he took it to the chemist and asked if he could cut each tablet into quarters the chemist replied yes but at your age sir i think you will need a full tablet to get an erection
my mate said look at my age i dont want an erection i only want it to stick out far enough so i dont pee on my slippers
Sparky30/11/2009 12:25:30
7631 forum posts
22 photos
Ha ha ha.........nice one Sadsam
George Arnold30/11/2009 12:49:00
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1834 forum posts
191 photos
Sam
 I see Derek wants to see your pens Hope you are not having trouble with lead.
George
PS it works
George
Sparky30/11/2009 14:18:15
7631 forum posts
22 photos
George!!
Delete30/11/2009 21:48:39
575 forum posts
Sam
 
Can you ask your mate if he can let me have an odd quarter.
We have two cats one Male and one Female both have been "done". The little girl calls the male he tries to do what he ought. but has a problem. The viagra might help!!!
Rog
Sparky30/11/2009 23:16:33
7631 forum posts
22 photos
Roger
You do know if you give it to the cat he wont be able to get through the cat flap!
Ron Davis01/12/2009 20:16:09
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1619 forum posts
201 photos
He should definatley take the whole tablet at bed time, along witha cup of cocoa, the cocoa will help him sleep and the viagra will stop him rolling out of bed!
 
Ron
George Arnold01/12/2009 22:27:16
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1834 forum posts
191 photos
I can remember in my youth playing tents, but thats in the dim and distant past, like a lot more activities. that was before viagra
 George 
Delete02/12/2009 15:24:10
575 forum posts
Marc
 
The cats are house cats so dont have a Cat Flap to negotiate.
 
Ron
Our Cats dont often fall out of bed.
 
Rog
John Jane02/12/2009 16:22:56
13 forum posts
I find if  you put Viagra in your tea it stops the biscuits going limp when you dunk them.
 
John
Old timer19/03/2010 20:41:54
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30 forum posts
21 photos
Hi Lads
I have just read your jokes, it was a nice break from wood related problems, As a young man I worked as a plasterer on the building, there was allways someone with a joke, I found this helps the day allong, keep up the good jokes even if they need a viagra to get them to stand on there own, I shall look for this page again, I am old now and  in need of a joke now and again to cheer me up, .
 
a little joke of my own." If I turn an Apple from pine, dose it make it a pine apple" not very good , but i was told to keep it clean. all the best to you all JB
sad sam21/03/2010 11:57:24
606 forum posts
242 photos
morning all
here is an early pun of the year
three women sat talking ( what else) they wanted to spice thier sex life up so  the single girl suggested they dressed up they all agreed to dress up wearing a mask and little else
the single girl waited for her fiance to come in when he arrived he found her wearing a black bra and high heeled shoes and a mask what a night they had
the mistress met her lover in his office after work she walked in with a black plastic mack on and a mask inviting her lover to remove the mack to find she was naked they made love all night
the married woman of twenty years welcomed her husband home wearing a mask black bra black bask and high heeled boots he walked in and said hello batman whats for tea
Doug21/03/2010 14:27:18
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3415 forum posts
35 photos
A man walks into Ann Summers to purchase some see-through lingerie for his wife. 

He is shown several possibilities that range from £50 to £150 in price, the more see-through, the higher the price. 

He opts for the sheerest item, pays the £150 and takes the lingerie home. 

He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on and model it for him. 

Upstairs the wife thinks 'I have an idea. It's so see-through that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on - do the modelling naked - return it tomorrow and get a £150 refund and keep the money for myself'. 

So she appears naked at the top of the stairs and strikes a pose. 

The husband says 'Stone me, it wasn't that creased in the shop'. 
 
 
George Arnold24/03/2010 20:04:23
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1834 forum posts
191 photos
That reminds me of the three old dears at the old peoples home, they where having a chat about what they coukd do to liven things up, they where out in the garden, it was a lovely summers day, there was two or three old fellows sitting on a bench in the garden,
so one of the old ladies said lets strip of and run across the garden in the nude, that will get the old mens attention, they stripped of and ran across in front of the bench where the old guys where sitting, one turned to the others did you see that, did you see what they where wearing, the other old bloke said , I don;t know what they where wearing but it looked as if it needed ironing to me.!
 
 George
Ron Davis24/03/2010 20:13:32
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1619 forum posts
201 photos
I heard this on the radio, Two men fishing from a boat, drinking a beer or two and generally not catching much. One said 'I am thinking about divorcing my wife', 'Why? said the other one. 'She aint spoke to me for two months'. A pause and the second one said 'You might want to think about that, women like that are hard to find'
 
Ron

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